Friday, March 02, 2007

Ten Indian Leaders - Find Them!

This is the National Indian Leaders Tree! A nice piece of art. How many leaders can you find? There are TEN in all.

Thursday, March 01, 2007

Pictures Worth A Thousand Words!

Shocking accident

Piggy Bank after filling the car up!

Police hard at work

I'd rather hold it!

Nice pile up

Nice Shot

The real desperate housewives

Bad spelling

Is it loud enough for you?

Bad Judgment

Monday, February 26, 2007

10 Ways to Handle Negative Emotions

I got this and do not know the source. It is a nice one about day today problems in peoples lives and ways to tackle them...

I am the managing director of a pharmaceutical company. My life is fairly comfortable - I earn good money and am settled in my personal life too with my wife, and two children," says 32-year-old Kolkata based Ravi Khanna. "But things are not as peaceful as they may seem. My family constantly complains about my irritability and lack of patience at home. I seem to react strongly to the children making a noise. Also, my wife thinks I often lose patience when I take her out shopping. What is surprising is that I was not like this a few years ago." he adds.
Does Ravi's story sound familiar? Is this the scene in your home as well?

You are probably facing emotional volatility - a state where you feel extremely positive one day and extremely negative on other days. In the down phase you tend to lose patience with those you interact with.

When does this happen? How can you overcome it? Prachi Vaish, a clinical psychologist offers help on both counts.

First, its probable causes:
1) Inability to find 'me' time:
Ravi is troubled by the demands on his time - either by bosses and customers or wife and children. Maintaining the balance is becoming increasingly difficult for him. Ravi feels he was fairly stable a few years ago and these bouts of annoyance are new. He feels, that for all his accomplishments, he is at the moment missing peace in his life.

Ragini Sharma, a Pune-based interior designer, has similar issues. She comes home after a long day at work to a round of cooking and children's homework. Her children no longer enjoy studying with her because she tends to scold them more than help them learn.

2) Personal life issues:
Issues in your relationships with your spouse, friends and relatives, over a period of time, create stress within you and bring about emotional volatility. Aditi Pariyani, a housewife, has been raising her two children in India, practically as a single parent. Her husband, who runs an electronics goods store in Hong Kong, seldom comes back to India to spend time with his family. Aditi is facing severe depression. She is irritable and has, over a period of time, lost her friends too, because of her emotional volatility.

Any kind of dissatisfaction from your current love relationship takes a toll on your well-being and the anxiety leads to a constantly volatile temper.

3) Post-retirement depression:
Prachi, who often deals with cases of severe depression and anxiety, rates retirement as a common cause of emotional volatility. "Women come to our clinics, wondering what has gone wrong with their husbands after retirement."

"He used to be fine earlier. But ever since he stopped working, he seems to have a problem with anything and everything at home. It's become impossible to even clean the room, as he will fret and fume about why his glasses were kept in a different place."

Prachi also deals with patients who behave nasty during phases when they are between jobs and have nothing to do. These people feel as though life is quickly passing them by, and others are growing in their careers.

4) Unforeseen circumstances:
Some of us undergo long periods of emotional volatility when an unexpected tragedy occurs in our lives. Like the death of a loved one, betrayal in relationships, etc often throw us into a depression. And that brings about extreme patterns of behaviour. One minute you feel you will be able to pick up the pieces and walk again. But the very next moment you find yourself snapping at even your near and dear ones.

5) Inability to express yourself:
Are you unable to articulate your thoughts about difficult/unpleasant situations? A shortage of communication skills is frustrating and can make you ill-humored and oversensitive.

Rajesh Gupta hails from a small town in Madhya Pradesh. He has achieved success, thanks to a lot of hard work. But he has a complex about his English skills and lack of grooming. It makes him unapproachable and ill-tempered. This works as a defense mechanism and has gradually alienated him.

II) How to prevent emotional volatility:

1) Meditate:
"The age-old science of meditation has helped one and all overcome the severest of anxiety disorders," says Prachi.

2) Try not to carry work home:
When the work day ends, end it there. Do not carry work troubles home. "Easier said than done", you will say. True, but "practice makes perfect", says Prachi.

3) Join a social cause:
When you shift focus from your own problems to bigger problems that people are facing in the world, it makes your pain tolerable. It also serves as a healthy cure for the issues responsible for your emotional volatility.

4) Be aware of your behaviour:
Observe yourself. This will help check negative behaviour.

5) Be aware of others:
You feel the need to be understood. But so do others. Be compassionate in your dealings with those around you and try to understand their situations. That will ultimately help you.

6) Enjoy nature:
Try going to the nearest garden in the evening. The grass and the plants may not be as green as they used to be when you were a kid, but you will feel a distinct change in the quality of air you breathe out there. The oxygen level is higher close to trees and plants before dusk.

7) Use transactional analysis:
Nearly all of us have witnessed behaviour patterns between parents and children. Transactional analysis or TA, developed by Canadian psychiatrist Eric Berne, classifies human behaviour as three ego states: Parent (aggressive, controlling, nurturing) Child (passive/submissive, defiant, impulsive) Adult (assertive, balanced, real) Each ego state is different for each person, as a perception of the parent, the child and the adult comes from your own parents, your own childhood and your own experiences in life, respectively.

The analysis establishes that all of us tend to use one or more patterns of behaviour from this set and encourages adult behaviour in situations of conflict. An adult looks at the situation objectively and instead of reacting in an impulsive way, asserts himself firmly but politely.

8) Read psychology:
Reading on psychology helps you understand not only why people behave the way they do with you but also why you react the way you do. It is therapeutic.
According to Prachi, "We use behavioural modification therapy under which, we recommend self-help books. I'm OK, You're OK by Thomas A Harris and Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman are two such books."

9) Express yourself:
"We ask our patients to join art, music or dance classes, as these allow free expression and hence are de-stressing in nature," says Prachi. "For those who are not interested in these, we encourage diary writing. It is better to blurt (your feelings) on paper rather than to people. Not only does it allow a vent to the person's feeling, but also lets him/her go back to it later and analyze his/her feelings" she adds.

10) Organize: Keep your home neat and tidy and your papers organized. Clean surroundings keeps your mind free from clutter. It negates the feeling of being overwhelmed and disorganized.

Sunday, February 25, 2007

Cards Are Important to A Woman

This is a lovely 1 minute video I received recently. Watch it.

Nice Tale on Solving a Complex Problem

I came across this beautiful story...the worst of problems can be solved if we apply to a problem hard enough!

Many years ago in a small Indian village, a farmer had the misfortune of owing a large sum of money to a village money lender.

The money lender, who was old and ugly, fancied the farmer's beautiful Daughter. So he proposed a bargain.

He said he would forgo the farmer's debt if he could marry his daughter. Both the farmer and his daughter were horrified by the proposal.

So the cunning money-lender suggested that they let providence decide the matter.

He told them that he would put a black pebble and a white pebble into an empty money bag. Then the girl would have to pick one pebble from the bag.

1) If she picked the black pebble, she would become his wife and her father's debt would be forgiven.
2) If she picked the white pebble she need not marry him and her father's debt would still be forgiven.
3) But if she refused to pick a pebble, her father would be thrown into Jail.

They were standing on a pebble strewn path in the farmer's field. As they talked, the money lender bent over to pick up two pebbles. As he picked them up, the sharp-eyed girl noticed that he had picked up two black pebbles and put them into the bag.

He then asked the girl to pick a pebble from the bag.

Now, imagine that you were standing in the field. What would you have done if you were the girl? If you had to advise her, what would you have told her?

Careful analysis would produce three possibilities:

1. The girl should refuse to take a pebble.
2. The girl should show that there were two black pebbles in the bag and expose the money-lender as a cheat.
3. The girl should pick a black pebble and sacrifice herself in order To save her father from his debt and imprisonment.

Take a moment to ponder over the story. The above story is used with the hope that it will make us appreciate the difference between lateral and logical thinking.

The girl's dilemma cannot be solved with Traditional logical thinking. Think of the consequences if she chooses the above logical answers.

What would you recommend to the Girl to do?

Well, here is what she did …

The girl put her hand into the moneybag and drew out a pebble. Without Looking at it, she fumbled and let it fall onto the pebble-strewn path where it immediately became lost among all the other pebbles.

"Oh, how clumsy of me," she said. "But never mind, if you look into the Bag for the one that is left, you will be able to tell which pebble I Picked."

Since the remaining pebble is black, it must be assumed that she had picked the white one. And since the money-lender dared not admit his Dishonesty, the girl changed what seemed an impossible situation into an extremely advantageous one.


Most complex problems do have a solution. It is only that we don't attempt to think.

Source of this piece: Funlok